20-week level-2 ultrasound

20 weeks pic 4Went to my 20-week level-2 ultrasound Monday, and all is well! This feels like the last really big hurdle to me. Everything is normal with the boy, and this pregnancy so far (knock wood) has been uneventful.

I was the least nervous I’ve ever been during this appointment. (Thank you very much, babybeat, for your steady reassurance—now when I listen, by the way, I hear both my heartbeat and the baby’s simultaneously, which is totally surreal.)

I was surprised to learn that his little head is now above my navel. I did not realize that he’d done so much moving up! And my placenta is right where it needs to be, too. No danger of previa.

Although I’ve felt released from the nightmare in increments throughout this pregnancy, this appointment felt particularly releasing. During the drive home, I felt bits and pieces of leftover paranoia and angst fly like ash out the window. I started humming. Have been humming to him off and since Monday. Petty daily annoyances are rolling off my back like water.

The first image of him I saw, he was bent in half, feet over head, like he was doing yoga. He squirmed and straightened out some, and I saw his legs—so long, so much longer than before, it seemed. His arms looked longer, too. His four-chamber heart was so obvious, and so obviously central to his being, pulsing away. Life!

The tech looked at him from below, and her eyes grew wider. “Woah! He’s definitely a boy!” she said.

I said, “Wait–what is that?”

“That would be his wee-wee,” she said, chuckling. “Like I said: no question there!”

“Is it particularly…big?”


20 weeks pic 6I’ve always felt a little funny about seeing ultrasound photos of other people’s baby’s genitals. But I’m going to post it here anyway, for my own diary-record. Even though I already knew it was a boy, it was amazing to see his unmistakable human-ness—not just that part, but all the parts that make up a tiny human, halfway to making it outside.

In the first pic, I sense a little bit of what his lips and nose might turn out to be. I don’t think I’m going to go for the 3-D u/s—or 4-D, or whatever they’re doing nowadays. I do want to leave some room for mystery (and besides, insurance doesn’t cover it).

I’m now wearing my maternity pants under the bump, not above it, and my nearly-one-pound baby is making himself known every day—though the movements are quite subtle and back to question-mark level. I don’t know what it was about that last day Out West when I felt him so distinctly. Maybe it was the altitude? Maybe it was resting after a week of high activity? Doctor says not to worry, he’s moving, and I’ll start to feel him more distinctly in the coming weeks.

Leave a comment


  1. He’s looking so good!!!! Hum away my friend. I hope he never finds out you posted his willy online before he even got here…he may have something to say about it :) but I know about the feeling a little funny. Guess it’s all part of our human-ness in getting here!

    • I have these fantasies of his one day reading this blog, understanding the long, hard journey, and how treasured he is…maybe I’ll delete this pic before that day comes. (:

      • I share your fantasies but in the back of my mind I hear “Mom how could you…” It truly going to be awesome getting the chance to find out what the wee’s will say!

  2. Lol, you posted his ‘weenis’ (insert beavis & butthead laugh). Lookin’ good–unmistakeably human and *male*. XOXO

  3. Looks like he has beautiful full lips! So sweet! I think with the movement thing, sometimes they get in positions where it gets harder to feel them. When they’re kicking the front of your stomach you’ll feel it, but then they turn around and they’re kicking your innards so it’s more subtle (except when your bladder’s the punching bag).

    • I know it—I am loving those lips! yeah, and something about the size and placement of my placenta might be muffling things, too. i’m so eager to feel more (but maybe not bladder punches).

  4. I think ultrasound genitalia are just fine! Glad everything is progressing so well!

  5. Congratulations – he looks perfect!

  6. I have a very gratuitous shot of my littles ones lady bits from our anatomy scan. It’s sort of nice to have the VERY clear image that there’s no guessing involved haha. So glad things are going well!! Clear movement should be very soon. It was my favorite part of pregnancy for sure.

  7. Wowzas! Yep! It’s a boy! Hehehe!! Love you updates ;)

  8. Esperanza

     /  July 24, 2014

    SOOOOOOO glad that 20 week scan looked good. I’m just so, so thrilled for you.

  9. How cool. Can’t believe it’s been that long already!

  10. He looks so perfect!! So happy that you’re half way there and things are going so beautifully!!

  11. So exciting!

  12. He’s GORGEOUS! I am so glad everything is as it should be. Oh, and I don’t think I’ve EVER seen an ultrasound willie so clearly visible before… That’s quite something! I don’t know, like most boys maybe he’d be proud of his package even in utero if he sees this later. ;-) Amazing, 20 weeks. I am so happy for you and excited for all the beautiful joys still to come!

    • I know it—I haven’t either! I was kind of awe-struck. I told DH, “That was not the experience I expected,” and he was like, “I don’t know why you’re so surprised, since he’s coming from me,” and I said, “No, no! Not because…er…it’s just that I expected to have to squint.” Very awkward conversation.(:


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  • About Me

    Me: 41
    DH: 38

    Fertility issue:
    Recurrent Pregnancy Loss
    6 pregnancy losses
    All early
    5 with my own eggs
    1 with donor egg

    Abnormal embryos

    Factor V Leiden heterozygous
    MTHFR heterozygous

    AFC: 2 - 12
    AMH: 0.2
    FSH: 6.8
    E2: 40
    LH: 2.8


    April 2011 -
    Natural conception, first try. Blighted ovum (gestational sac only). D&C to remove products of conception at 9 weeks.

    Oct 2011 -
    Natural conception, first try. Blighted ovum (gestational sac & yolk sac). Took Cytotec to induce miscarriage at 9 weeks. PTSD, depression, anxiety, insomnia, night terrors followed.

    Winter 2012 -
    Two rounds of Femara/Clomid + IUIs at Columbia and RS of NY. The idea: to produce more eggs and increase chances of catching a good one. BFNs.

    April 2012 -
    Natural conception, first try. Ultrasound showed activity in the uterus, but no complete sac. Diagnosed with "missed abortion." Natural miscarriage at 5 weeks.

    June 2012 -
    Conception after 7 mg Femara for 5 days + IUI. Diagnosed with chemical pregnancy. Natural miscarriage at 4.5 weeks.

    August 2012 -
    Natural conception, without trying. Chemical pregnancy and natural miscarriage at 5 weeks.

    October 2012 -
    ODWU at Colorado Center for Reproductive Medicine (CCRM).

    January 2013 -
    IVF with Dr. Schoolcraft.
    Straight Antagonist protocol

    What he predicted:
    I will produce 11 eggs
    Good chance 1 will be normal
    30% chance 2 will be normal
    Transfer 1, then a 45% chance of success
    Transfer 2, then a 65% chance of success

    What happened:
    7 follicles stimulated
    6 mature eggs retrieved
    2 died during ICSI
    4 fertilized
    3 out of 4 embryos CCS-tested
    All abnormal

    Aug/Sept 2013-
    Frozen Donor Egg IVF at Reproductive Biology Associates (RBA)
    What Dr. Shapiro predicted:
    6 or 7 will fertilize
    1 we will transfer
    1 - 3 we will freeze

    Protocol: Lupron, Vivelle patches, Crinone

    8 frozen eggs from donor thawed
    6 fertilized
    1 Day-5 Grade A XBbb blastocyst transferred
    1 Day-5 Grade A EBbb blastocyst frozen
    1 Day-6 Grade A XBbb blastocyst frozen

    September 13, 2013: Pregnant

    Prenatal vitamins & baby aspirin,
    Vivelle patches & Crinone

    Beta #1: 171
    Beta #2: 706
    Beta #3: 7,437

    6 w 3 d: measured 6 w 1 d
    FHR: 80 bpm
    Fetus did not grow
    7 w: FHR 121 bpm
    8 w: heart stopped
    9 w: D and C

    Test results: We lost a normal karyotype male for unexplained reasons

    Quit stressful job
    Anti-inflammation diet
    Gluten-free diet
    Vit D, DHA/EPA
    Therapy/energy work
    Creative Visualization
    Art Therapy

    March 14, 2014:
    Double FET at RBA
    1 Day-5 Grade A EBbb blastocyst
    1 Day-6 Grade A XBbb blastocyst

    March 24, 2014:

    Prenatals, baby aspirin, Folgard, Vivelle, Crinone, Lovenox

    Beta #1: 295
    Beta #2: 942
    Beta #3: 12,153

    1 fetus implanted

    Measured on track

    Fetal heart rate:
    7 wk: 127 bpm, 8wk:159 bpm, 9wk: 172 bpm

    Due date: Dec, 4 2014!

    NatureMade (USP Seal) Prenatals and 4000 Vit D3
    Baby aspirin
    40 mg Lovenox
    DHA and EPA
    Folgard 2.2

    Born: One perfect baby boy 12.4.14

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