Wyoming, Ohio, and Memorial Day BBQ

I’m so happy today—I bought my tickets to Wyoming, and I will be spending a week in July with one of my best friends, whom I’ve now been friends with for 13 years. I believe I call her “Elle” on this blog (I should keep track of these pseudonyms).  She’s the one with twin girls, 9-year-olds conceived via donor sperm. AND another dear friend of both of ours, I’ll call her KL, a novelist and triathelete, will be road-tripping through WY during that time. The three of us, who used to be a trio in grad school (my first grad school, my MFA, University of Michigan), are going to have a reunion. And I will 19 -20 weeks pregnant when all of this happens. And all of these details combined make me want to jump out of my skin with glee.

I love it when plans work out! So rare these days to get calendars and life paths to coincide.

So thankful I get to share part of my pregnancy with my girls.

I’m also zeroing in on a gender-reveal party date: the 28th. And thinking I might be in Ohio the last week of June and first week of July, with my family.

This past weekend, we went to a friend’s in Forest Hills for a Memorial Day BBQ. (I brought gluten-free baked mac n cheese that I made with a cookbook my sisterfriend R gave to me. It was a knock-out.) The last time we went to a BBQ at their place, we had just eloped, and they surprised us with Champagne. This time, as we stepped into the back yard, they erupted in applause for us (DH had told the whole group of the pregnancy, via email). Flowers were waiting for us, and someone had bought me a giant jar of pickles. It was so sweet—those people. They are DH’s friends from a long time back, and I’ve known them for only 5 years, but they treat me with such intimacy and warmth it always happily overwhelms me.

The hostess has two children, and she says that at 5 months pregs, she wants us to come back, via car not train, and she will load our trunk with baby stuff. “I won’t tell you all of the things I’m going to give to you now,” she said, “because you will freak out. But by 5 months, you’ll be ready.”

Another friend there has three children, and I ended up playing with the youngest girl quite a bit. She was sweet and smiley and loved to pretend to feed me and give me sips from her empty cup. She was so self-sufficient, with her little pink car and wad of Kleenex, which could become, at will, a bird or a ball.

The oldest boy was having trouble sharing with the other kids. He kept trying to hide his baseball bat down the back of his shirt, which, um, really didn’t work.

He burst into tears at one point from all of the stimulus and sharing demands, and I could tell that his dad (a psychologist) just didn’t know what to do.

DH played with the middle girl—leggos and plastic figurines. She was a very aggressive little thing and kept slamming her poor giraffe into the floor. “Oh no, don’t hurt me,” DH kept saying in a high-pitched voice, but she was relentless. It got to the point where we couldn’t help but laugh at how brutal she was being. “My neck is broken,” DH cried in his falsetto. “Owwww!”

I could tell what we were doing. Observing. Experimenting. Thinking about the future. All of the stages of childhood were laid out before us for us to watch, interact with.

“I’ve changed a diaper maybe three or four times in my life,” I said to DH. DH, who is also the youngest sibling, said he’d done it about the same number of times (for his niece). We looked at each other. And then we just burst out laughing.

“Book says we can expect to change diapers about six to twelve times a day at first,” I added. We laughed some more. I wanted a mocktail.

I came home, joined Pinterest, and started a “Nursery” board. (And also, for the record, a “Mocktails” board.)

Good times are happening, and so many more to come. It is going to be one damn fine summer.

Leave a comment


  1. Make yourself a mocktail margarita (mockarita?? I kill me!) and worry about diapers later. Plenty of time for that! Your girls’ get together sounds like great fun. I’m having one with mine this weekend and can’t wait. It’s so therapeutic!

  2. you are going to have an awesome summer!! I can’t wait to read about all of your travels and the gender reveal party excites me more than you know! I will need your address so I can send you a few gifts ;) 10hopeingod@gmail.com

  3. Yeah! Look me up on pinterest girl! xx

  4. What a fun summer you have planned!! Cannot wait to hear about your gender reveal party!!


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